I'm happy to report my standards have gone up. I live in a small village near the capital with a host family of six. When I need food, it's there. When I need water, it's there. I even have the option to make it hot. I've avoided the open manholes and roaming packs of dogs. I've milked a cow and laundered clothes by hand. I've watched more television in the past three weeks than I ever watched in the states, because it's not unusual for a family here to have a flat screen TV and no running water. I've ridden the marshrutkas, strolled the bazaars, stroked a wild hedgehog and mastered the outhouse.
It's the small things, folks.
Let me catch you up:
March:
Here we go! Break the ice at the K-19 meet-and-greet. Who are these people?
Wander alone through Istanbul airport saddled with the luggage of several other people. Long story. Lesson learned: Don't take on more than you actually want to carry.
Welcome to Kyrgyzstan! Holy crap, there is a man in a penguin suit. Thanks, K-18s.
PST begins. Little do we know that this dilapidated, drafty hotel is truly the lap of luxury. Lesson learned: Don't lean on the railings.
Host Family Matching Ceremony! Get on stage in front of hundreds of people and find your new mom, so she can take you by the hand and teach you how to feed, bathe and care for yourself all over again.
Kyrgyz food isn't bad. Just be prepared for a lot of meat, fat and oil. And nan. And chai. Oh, and chai.
Culture point – Toilet paper does not go in the toilet or down the hole. Use the waste bin.
Word of the month – Жакшы (jaksha) Good. The MOST used adjective I've ever heard. As in, “Баaры Жакшы!” It's all good.
April:
Acquire a mysterious infection that results in a crap-load of pus coming out of your hand. Get well soon.
Hear the chorus of your life in a foreign tongue, “Are you a boy or a girl?”
Begin wearing a head scarf.
Feel grateful to be healthy while other Trainees do the Kyrgyzstani shuffle and start building thigh muscle in the outhouse.
PST continues. Feel your brain begin its decline into a pool of mush.
Why do Kyrgyz people eat so much meat? Because it has Vitamins Ү, ϴ and Ы. The difference between Ү and Ы can mean the difference between “vomit” and “girl”. You call the cow a “house” and say “I'm sorry” to people when you greet them.
Gain ten pounds.
Disco at an orphanage. Disco on a marshrutka.
Culture point – Dogs are not housepets. When walking outside, keep rocks in your pockets.
Word of the month – Уят (ooyat) Shameful. The MOST appropriate word for standard American behavior. As in, "Уят жок.” No shame.
(See Meghan's awesome blog for more on this: http://yurtssogood.com/)
May:
Observe a sheep slaughtering.
Get schooled in a soccer match by boys wearing clogs.
Permanent Site Placement! Where did your dart land on the map? You are staying in Chui, the northernmost Oblast and most Russified region, and will work with a former German language teacher. Prepare to brush up on your Russian while you keep plugging away at the Kyrgyz.
Become deathly ill during your site visit, leaving the locals alarmed that they have received a broken Volunteer. No refunds.
Teach your host sister how to play Speed - a card game that sounds like the Russian word SPID, which translates to AIDS. Other false friends: “moth” sounds like “drunk” and “sick” sounds like “fuck” and “um” sounds like “vagina”. No ums, ahs or uhs? We're all going to become better public speakers.
Language Proficiency Interview! Score advanced-low. In actuality, sound like a slow 3 year old.
Culture point – It is okay to double-dip.
Word of the month – Майда бышкан нандай (Maida bishkan nandai) Like fatty, fried bread. A good way to make your elders laugh when they ask you how you are doing.
June:
You are now an official Peace Corps Volunteer! Hurray.
It's a whole new world here. I'll try to keep y'all posted, but for now enjoy some more pictures:
